Every year, there are more than 2.2 million couples who make the decision to get married. But unfortunately, there are also more than 800,000 couples who make the decision to get divorced.
In a perfect world, all married couples would live happily ever after following their wedding day. But as we all know, most couples experience marital problems at one time or another and put their vows to the test.
If you and your spouse are currently having trouble, you should know you’re not alone. Just about all couples fight and have a tough time keeping things together. It comes with the territory when you agree to spend the rest of your life with someone.
But you should make sure your problems don’t spiral too far out of control. Here are 5 signs that show you and your significant other might be having marital problems at the moment.
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1. You’re Not Communicating Effectively
If you were to sit down with a bunch of couples who have been married for more than 50 years and ask them the key to their marital success, what do you think their response would be?
More often than not, these people would tell you that communication is the key to a good marriage. If you and your spouse can communicate effectively, you can make it through just about anything.
Keeping the lines of communication open isn’t always easy, though. There are a lot of couples who don’t know how to communicate with one another about everything from their daily to-do lists to their deepest, darkest secrets.
It’s a good idea to make good communication one of the goals for your marriage right from the very beginning. You and your spouse need to know how to sit down and have meaningful conversations about everything that’s going on both inside and outside of your marriage.
As long as you communicate, communicate, and then communicate some more, you and your spouse will stay on the same page at all times and avoid the marital problems that come along with not communicating.
2. You Don’t Trust One Another
While good communication is one of the most important aspects of a successful marriage, it’s not the only thing you need to be concerned about as far as keeping your marriage strong. You and your spouse also need to trust one another, and if that trust is ever broke, you need to work hard to get it back.
Couples stop trusting one another for all different types of reasons. In some cases, it’s because one person has been unfaithful and cheated on their spouse. In others, it’s because one person has developed a secret addiction and refused to share details about it with their partner.
If you and your spouse don’t trust each other completely, you’re doing a huge disservice to your marriage. Trust obviously needs to be earned over time, but you can work on developing it by giving marriage counseling a try. Check it out to see how it might benefit you and your husband or wife.
3. You’re Not Intimate Anymore
Sex is still a taboo topic in many circles. But if you’re going to have a long and happy marriage, sex needs to play a big part in it.
You might be surprised to find that anywhere from 15 to 20 percent of couples have a “sexless” marriage. That means that they only have sex about 10 times throughout the course of a given year.
If you and your spouse are only having sex roughly one time every month, it could indicate an issue with your marriage. A lack of intimacy isn’t good for either person in a relationship.
There are other ways that you and your spouse can and should be intimate, too, outside of just having sex. You should also be holding hands, hugging, and even just sitting close to one another on the couch while you watch TV on a regular basis.
If you’re not? There could be marital problems that you’re not seeing. You should speak openly with your spouse about the lack of sex and intimacy within your marriage.
4. You’ve Lost Respect for Each Other
Every single married couple fights. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been married for a month, a year, or half a century. You’re going to argue and bicker with your spouse, sometimes on multiple occasions throughout the course of the same day.
But it’s not necessarily the fighting that should concern you. Rather, you should be concerned if you and your spouse lose respect for each other at any point during the arguments that take place.
Standing your ground on certain issues and arguing with your spouse about them is normal. But name-calling and belittling your spouse is not. So if you find that you’re putting your spouse down on a regular basis or if you’re the victim of this all the time, you have a problem.
It’s OK for you and your spouse to disagree about different things happening in your life. But it’s not OK for you to be disrespectful in any form or fashion when you’re talking them out.
5. You Don’t Share the Same Hopes and Dreams
Before two people get married, they usually sit down and talk about their hopes and dreams for the future. They discuss everything from whether or not they want kids to where they want to go in their respective careers.
But over time, a person’s hopes and dreams can change. And when they do, it can cause marital problems if you’re not careful.
You and your spouse should continue talking about your hopes and dreams for the future every so often to make sure you still want the same things. It’ll tie your collective hopes and dreams together and allow you to pursue them as a couple instead of as individuals.
Address Marital Problems Before They End Your Marriage
Marital problems can put a real strain on your marriage. But they can also make your marriage stronger as long as you address them accordingly and work your way through them.
The last thing you want to do is ignore marital issues and have them ruin your marriage. If you take that approach, it won’t be long before you and your spouse are duking it out in divorce court.
Read our blog to learn more about why your marriage is worth saving, no matter how bad your marital problems might get.